Thursday, February 12, 2015

"Having lost everything, we have found the greatest happiness!"


"My husband and I want to tell our story in order couples who for years try to have a baby to believe and find happiness of parenthood.
Our acquaintance with the infertility problem started with the fact that I have diabetes which affects all organs and systems in course of time. From the first day doctors told me that it will be quite problematic to bear and give birth to a healthy baby with such a diagnose. But medical workers left open the possibility of a positive outcome as well. Nevertheless all our hopes flew into pieces when I underwent the anti-mullerian hormone test. It’s a female fertility testing gives an estimate of the remaining egg supply. The result was irrefutable - I cannot get pregnant in a natural way! Of course, we were retested in several different laboratories, but the answer was the same - infertility! By this time, I had suffered through the pyelonephritis illness (an inflammatory kidneys disease) and faced with heart problems. To this set of diseases was added stress and negative thoughts concerning childlessness. All this time my husband supported me but I felt that it will not last for long. He wanted a real family, with child's laugh in the house and home-made cakes, but not a barren wife, crying herself to sleep at night. Of course I heard about surrogacy. Now Internet, TV and magazines contain a great number of information concerning assisted methods of reproductive medicine. I thought hard, imagined it and finally decided. In the Internet I found American clinic with a good comments and long-term work experience. After a brief correspondence with a clinic’s worker I made an appointment. Husband at first was a little bit shocked, but agreed to visit American clinic. It is called Center for Human Reproduction, New York. After a medical examination, American doctors told us that they can help us to have children using surrogacy with donor eggs. After my husband was explained what "donor eggs" means he got angry and said he would never agree for such procedure. But at the end, I managed to convince him. And we decided to try in the USA to conduct our first attempt. Great advantage of surrogacy in America is USA passport obtaining that opens good opportunities in future. There are no lines, high level of medical services; doctors always try to achieve a positive result from the first attempt. I also liked the fact that in America we didn’t need to wait for years for our turn, as it can be seen in some countries where patients wait for years in order to start the program. In America we had an opportunity to choose hotel of a god quality and price (up to 100$) for our comfortable stay. But there is a second side of the issue as well. Even America has it’s certain disadvantages. Medical programs there are extremely overpriced. And you need to pay separately for each attempt - 1 attempt costs 120 thousand dollars, 2 - 220 thousand dollars, and 3 attempts - 300 thousand dollars. At the same time, it’s not a final price. We had to pay for a number of hidden fees. We conducted two attempts in America, and they were unsuccessful. We spent a lot of money, were tired and very disappointed with American medicine. Things can't be all that good as it’s written in the American advertising.
Our next medical state was Czech Republic and Iscare Centre of Assisted Reproduction IVF. We found it on one patient’s advice of, whom we accidentally met in one of the clinics. In this case as it’ said "female radio" helped. In Czech Republic we went being a little bit frustrated after the United States, but our hope was still alive, of course. Husband thought that it’s not a good idea and I had to calm him, I said: “Honey, we've been down before, but we always come back fighting! Never say die”. In Czech Republic surrogacy is not regulated by law. There are no legal regulations, which consider surrogacy issue. In spite of this, they conduct such programs. There are good service, clinic, modern equipment, but ... due to the fact that there is no relevant law, it is not organized, not confident and we had no guarantee that everything will be fine. After all, if something goes wrong we will not be able to make the case. Nevertheless at our own risk we conducted one attempt, it wasn’t successful and we went came back home.
Georgia has become the final nail in the coffin of our patience. We arrived in the Atlanta Center for Reproductive Medicine being almost unable to believe in a positive result. In Georgia surrogacy is absolutely legal. According to the local law, if a child was born by a surrogate mother, child's parents are spouses, but not a surrogate mother. Clinics of reproductive medicine are great there with talented doctors. Visiting Georgian center we were surrounded by the highest level of medical service, constant care and attention. Beautiful, positive, European level, friendly staff. But there is one problem - for some reason doctors can’t reach positive result. In addition we faced with a problem of Caucasian donor eggs as there are mostly Georgian ones.
Surfing the internet, I stumbled upon the Ukrainian clinic BioTexCom. I've seen its advertising, but didn’t draw my attention to it, as Ukraine sounds not so convincing. The third world country with an unstable political situation, and indeed it was hard to imagine how they conduct such programs as surrogacy. But, to my surprise, BioTexCom is very popular in the internet; there are a lot of positive reviews, official site written in different languages, a lot of articles on serious foreign news sites. So I decided to learn more about it. We were attracted with a good price and "all inclusive" medical packages. My husband and I decided that we will visit this Ukrainian clinic but it will be our last medical travel. We spent all our saved money, moreover, took on loans and sold our family car. Morally, we were exhausted, mentally upset, under constant stress and tension. But we really wanted a baby very much!!! We wished to be a real family, bring up our lovely child, walk with him in parks and see how he grows and every day surprises us with something new... Firstly, I corresponded with an English-speaking manager of the clinic (I sent her all our medical examinations, diagnosis, etc.). Then I called her and after our conversation, she settled me the day when we can come to the first consultation with a doctor. Manager was fluent in English and knew medical theme very well. Reaching Kiev (capital of Ukraine) we were met by the clinic’s driver at the airport.  He took us to the clinic’s hotel. It was a small, cozy and with all necessary amenities for comfortable living hotel. And all these, important to note, we got without paying a penny. The next day the same driver took us to the clinic. There manager with whom I corresponded met us. She organized all work processes in the clinic, told us what to do, in short, she was our personal assistant. Great service, courtesy and professionalism of manager helped us to lift in spirits. Doctor, examining our medical history, said: "Everything will be OK. You will leave us with a baby in your arms. "

We were cheered up with doctor’s words, and we believed that our dream about so long-awaited child will come true. I will not tell a long story about all the advantages of BioTexCom clinic, I’ll only say the most important thing - surrogate mother gave birth to a healthy boy, using donor eggs, from the second attempt. So today we have a healthy beautiful son. We are happy but husband periodically psyched that son look like an egg donor. But, in course of time, all these emotions had gone and we are incredibly pleased with the BioTexCom clinic. Now we know that there is really no absolute infertility! ;)  

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